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I will tell you how it is when you feel guilty or you are accused by somebody for his suffering although you had no such intention.
My friend Loria had a broken family. Her husband was not at all involved in family interest.Her son’s murphy and rallys were also not at all bothered. She felt a sting . Why this to me. She has seen her sisters always with her husband and sons hovering around them and always being together.All decisions were taken together. In her case she will say others will be quiet. IT WILL APPEAR AS IF SHE IS DOMINATING BUT ACTUALLY IT IS NOT SO.
She had always helped everyone in distress. She had tried to put up with family requirements by working hard in a office and also doing all household chores. Neither her sons nor her husband realized the effort put by her to look after the family, maintain relationship by helping others etc. Her helping others was termed as show -off or interfering in others matters by her sons & husband. She could not express her feelings which twined her. Her feeling that her parents should never run to others with problems, nor her in-laws should sway their hands before others for help. This feeling of hers made her rush when anyone was in trouble.After all it is their extended family.
Feelings of children
Her sons felt why other sisters and brothers of both the families should not have the same feelings. This was a mode of escape.
The same feelings were not there with her parents or in-laws either. They used her. She had the habit of forgetting and forgiving and again flee to their rescue if required by them.
Her children did not appreciate it. One kept quiet. The other used to throw tantrums with different reasons. She asked him about his behavior. he would not reply.consulted with several counselors and she also tried hitting him so that he could reprimand his ways. Ultimately he became revengeful and she had to consult a psychiatrist.
Lorias old age
Now she is tired and fed up and her husband also passed away. In her parents house or in-laws house all problems got settled. She is now with her two sons thinking why this?
Now that she is completely at home , she asked her sons where am I wrong? her son replied “instead of looking after us and our house you kept us last, so our house is suffering while all those of whom you helped are fine “
“At-least God is not so cruel to snatch you away from us”.Hearing this Loria felt really guilty and said “sorry”.
We take people living with us with us for granted and think we are giving them many things. But we are our self poor because we are not knowing what they require i.e. time which can never be reverted. So a small mistake of not realizing where she is going wrong made her do so many mistakes for which she is regretting all her life.
Let us learn a lesson from Loria that we should never take our own people for granted and we should give them what they require i.e. time which is the most precious gift given by God to mankind.
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